Below is a photo of a KitKat machine taken in the old Jaguar plant at Browns Lane, Coventry.

I can actually remember a time when a chocolate bar did cost 20p.

Today a road I was on was closed and someone sent me off in another direction, at which point I accidentally ended up in the middle of an RAF air base.

Entrance

Danger live explosives in use keep out when red flags are flying

Keep out when red flags are flying. Ooops?

Runway

APC

APC

Today I went to the gym and was shocked to see an elderly asian lady (at least 80 years old) in FULL asian garb working out on the stairmaster. It looked like she was struggling a bit, and I honestly wondered if it was someone’s mother and she was just messing around waiting for someone.

But then she asked these two guys who were torturing themselves on the leg press how many more sets they had left. When they finished she did no more than get into the leg press and start pressing 420 pounds. Actually I’m kidding about the 420 pounds but she did use the leg press.

I left my phone in the car otherwise I’d have taken a photo. It’s got to be the strangest thing I have seen so far this year. I mean don’t get me wrong, good luck to her. It’s just not what you would expect to see, especially in a meathead gym.

Today I parked a little way away from where I work, and on returning to my car there was a note on my windscreen, addressing me by name, saying:

“Carrot, I love you. Do you love me??? Think of the man love we could share!!! I’m yours and panting. Bob”

Now I strongly suspect someone I know has committed this deed, however they would have quite a long walk to where I had parked, and I have never parked there before so they would not know to look. Not only that, but everyone I know in the area was working at the time.

In addition to this, I had hundreds of missed calls to my mobile the night before from a withheld number, and today I got a text message saying: “I’m watching you… True love is brown and sticky. Please answer when I call. You ignored me last night love Bob!”

Also note the perfect spelling and grammar which means it’s unlikely it’s any of my friends ¬_¬

A long time ago, a kid asked another kid that was crazy about pokemon if he liked mudkips. The kid answered with very bad grammar and very enthusiastically that he loved them. The first person asked if he would f*** one and before he said “if you were a mudkip” the kid agreed in the affirmative. The first kid said that he happened to have a mudkip doll with him and when he pulled it out, the mudkip lover had whipped off his pants and was on the ground actually f***ing it.
Not to get between a man and his mudkipz, the guy stepped away while a crowd began to form around the strange boy.

(The following is what is believed to happen)
A girl tried to take the doll, the insane boy bit her. Naturally this pissed off her football-captain esque boyfriend who gathered some of his buddies and beat the living s*** out of the kid.

(The following is confirmed)
When a teacher came, the students were sent to their classrooms. Eventually, there was an announcement over the loudspeaker that requested the football team members to come forward and also an individual who had thrown a flaming plush mudkip doll into the library. Over the loudspeaker came the voice of a woman later identified as the weird boy’s mother screaming, “You little motherfuckers, I’ll sue!” but was quickly shut down.

So I ask you: do you liek mudkipz?